Tropical toilets

No matter how I live in Asia I will never enjoy going to the toilet. I am getting used to it but I don't like it.

First it's just a hole in the ground, that's it. The whole squatting thing is not as nice and pratical as it seems. For one it makes sure I can never get drunk here as I need all the balance I can have. Second, there is no flushing system, there is a bucket. Enough said.

Sure at least I have plumbing but I also have the upside of living in a tropical country with the hottest months approaching. Not only are there mosquitoes in the bathroom (it means I take a shower while watching my back to see if I don't get bitten), there are geckos (lizzards that make a strange geckooooo sound) - I know they are harmless but it's weird to try and take a dump when there are five of them staring at you upside down - some spiders and then from time to time there are frogs. Like last night, it was so hot I couldn't sleep and kept drinking water. I had to rush to the bathroom only to see the biggest frog of my life on the wall next to the toilet. It looked ready to pounce. How can you work under those conditions?

They tell me it's only going to be worse as the heat sneaks in. I can't wait.